Oh, To Be Kind

I must share a little shameful story with you. I’m embarrassed because first it reveals my affinity for fries, and second because it will tell you a harsh thought I judged about another person. 

I was sitting in the drive-through getting ready to give my cash to the fast food employee. My son and I were going to share some fries. As I waited for the worker to open the window, I noticed he was a pretty tubby man. I snickered to myself and thought, “He must eat a lot at his work.” When that thought popped into my head, I was amused and then ashamed. But, what happened next was delightful. Something I had been meditating on flashed in my head: “May he be safe and free from suffering. He has hopes and fears too.” And it was as if a switch flipped. I went from laughing at him to knowing he is a human with value and someone to be treated with kindness.

Last week, I wrote about showing kindness and empathy towards yourself. It’s the first piece in showing kindness to others. But, we must not forget to extend the kindness to all we meet! We need to be kind towards others in what we think about them and how we act toward them.

We have an excellent example of kindness in God’s word when we look at the life of Jesus. Jesus was unhurried and noticed those who others looked past. He was kind to his friends, to the sick, and even to those who would betray him and nail him to a cross. The Bible says, “It’s his kindness that leads them to repentance.”*

If we want to follow the example of Christ, we are to walk in kindness. To love others is to be kind. In Corinthians it says, “Love is patient, love is kind…”**

I believe to be kind is first a decision. It takes a point where you “put a stake in the ground” and choose from this point on you will treat others with kindness. Then after you decide, you need the strength to act out kindness. 

This is the exciting part! The Bible says that kindness is a fruit of the Spirit.*** That means if you have a relationship with God and His Spirit is in you, you already have the strength to be kind inside of you. Kindness can be drawn from the power you possess in God. It isn’t something you need to muster on your own.

As I pondered acts of kindness this week, I thought of three ways kindness can be given in any situation.

1. Ask good questions. Draw others out with good questions and consider their points of view or desires. When they answer a question, find another question to ask from what they said. Questions can show consideration and genuine interest and this shows kindness.
2. Remember. Work hard to remember other’s names, special dates like a birthday or anniversary, or details they share about their family or past. Remembering these details shows others you care about them. Just like you would remember an appointment for a school activity, you can jot down names and dates or record it in your phone. For a long time I couldn’t remember a neighbor’s children’s names, so I made a note in my phone. That way I could pull it up when I was out and about and saw them.
3. Speak words of encouragement. It’s easy to be harsh or negative. This is especially true if someone has upset or angered us. To speak words that build others up takes a special wisdom. I think true words of encouragement is one of the most powerful ways to show kindness.

To give kindness is like sharing a smile. Both you and the receiver greatly benefit! Your attitude and quality of life grow in a positive direction when you treat others with value. 

In summary, remember Jesus is our best example of kindness, kindness is love in action, and God’s Spirit working in us gives us strength to be kind. Three ways you can choose kindness are to ask good questions, remember details about people, and speak words of encouragement.

-Kassie Joy

P.S. See below for a story from Mandy.

*Romans 2:4

**1 Corinthians 13:4

***Galatians 5:22-23

I believe I have one huge heart, I always have. I also believe that the world we are in needs more kindhearted people. Does kindness have to be a huge gesture? Absolutely not. A few weeks ago I found myself crying in my car as I headed to go grocery shopping. I was in my own world that day, headed home from work. I got off of interstate, and sitting on the side of the road was an older Fed-Ex driver checking his truck. Ok no big deal, so I wave and go on. I’m home for a couple hours and then get ready to head out, and I see the same truck, with the same man checking his truck in the little pull off area going into town. It is over 100 degrees and I feel horrible. I was always taught you don’t pull over for someone because you don’t know what their intent is, but something was pulling on my heart. (Please be smart about it though.) So I turned around and went to get water, and a V8 (not knowing how long he would have to be there). Let me tell you, he was so appreciative. He thanked me over and over. I left knowing that I was meant to stop; to show kindness to a man who was far from home. Simple as giving someone a drink of water.

-Mandy June